A few weeks ago, my husband would have told you that I was a flaming shrew. The combination of a currently high stress job, being back in college with actual homework, gymnastics, youth group and my own two children who struggle with homework, my own bible study/mentor meetings and I was ready to tear my hair out. It was only going to take one small thing to send me over the edge...
.....it was a poorly painted wall that did it. Frantic to finish the back room, I demoted my husband from painter and took over. For some reason, in all the painting we've done in the last few years, we still do not have a stepladder. So here I was, standing on a very unstable and rickety stool trying to paint near the ceiling. This, after a few early birthday drinks with some friends (and btw Mark, thanks for that shot of liquid cocaine....nasty), does not a good combination make. My lovely husband is quite protective of me and did not want me on the stool. I was not, of course, listening to reason and it lead to an argument. About how I absolutely HAD to finish painting because it was the one thing I could control. Jimmy said.....wait for it.....that I sounded just like my mother. Now that's something no woman wants to hear. And it certainly did nothing to improve my frantic mood.
Later that night though, that little comment gave me much food for thought. And my comment leading up to that was a definite eye opener. Who was I to think that I could control anything??? It was apparent that I was trying to do this all on my own. Silly Meghan. You would have thought that I would have learned this lesson by now. Over and over again I try to assert my dominance over my own situation, my own destiny. And over and over again, God gently reminds me that He has the reins. You would think that since I'm a reasonably smart woman, I'd have caught on by now. Properly chastened, I bowed my head in obedience to the only One who can carry me through anything.
Let me just tell you how He has blessed me since then. We had a blizzard. I might have been one of the few people that found that to be a blessing but it was, in a huge way. My class was canceled on Tuesday night and she gave us no homework for the week so that freed my week up. Then, my hubby & I got a snow day from work on Wednesday due to the weather conditions. A full day to chill with no homework to do?!?! Yes please! I was able to catch up on laundry and read whatever I wanted to read to my little hearts content. It has been a very relaxed week and I am very thankful to God for it. I know Jimmy is certainly thankful that his wife is no longer a psycho termagant.
Next week, it's back to the grind but I will be going back to it with a renewed heart and spirit. I know that with God, all things are possible. Even facing down the 5th graders homework on prime factorization in both expanded and exponential notations.
